I wanna talk to you this morning. You, who has no workout plan. You, who has no savings plan. You, who still doesn’t have a passport. You, who still doesn’t have a Valentine to look forward to. You, who still has not revised that resume. You, who has ZERO idea what the next twelve days, let alone twelve months has in store for you.
You are not alone.
This thought behind this entry has been snaking around my head for months now, time spent relentlessly taking stock of all the things I haven’t accomplished. It didn’t come to fruition until I saw the featured image this morning. I was standing on the Metra platform on this balmy (for January), but foggy Tuesday, unable to see anything further than a few yards in front of my face. It dawned on me that view was like my future….foggy as fuck.
As we all know, but may need to be reminded at times, social media makes everyone seem like they have everything together. We cannot refuse the urge to use our contemporary’s lives as measuring sticks. And the folks I consider my contemporaries have me feeling like the most fucked up fuckup that ever fucked up. New York Times Best Sellers List. Sitcoms on air. Sitcoms in development. Book deals. Popping podcasts. Invites to the last White House Xmas Party that will ever matter. Digital Maventry on fleek. (I made up that word. Maventry, not fleek – Im not that brilliant.) Me? I write on this blog every six weeks and get a good amount of love, enough that propels me to the next entry. But I know that’s not enough.
Truth is, I’m flailing. I wholeheartedly and nakedly admit that.
Fortunate enough to interview Issa, but not driven enough to enter a contest to become an employee of hers. Uggggggggggggggh.
Adventurous to enough to travel to Europe, but not smart enough to do video blogs while there. Duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Talented enough to have strangers and friends actually take the time to write me about how they love my work, but clueless about how to make that translate to actual financial freedom from corporate America. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh.
Attractive enough to have had some stunning pictures taken for my revamped website, but too lazy to tell the photog which ones I wanted retouched for use, which is pushing back the re-launch of Myalogy. Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarf.
Howsinevah…..
This year, I’m taking the steps to surround myself with the right people. Not necessarily to remove anyone, but to spend time with people that pour into me creatively and can propel me to my greatness and hopefully, I can do the same for them.
This entry was the first step. Several people I respect and care for have told me the same thing, “just write.”
I wrote this.
This week, I will apply for a position that could take me to a foreign land.
Also this week, I will guest on a radio show.
Next month, I’m travelling to NYC to meet with a cool black girl screenwriter/filmmaker to learn how to take a script from A to Z. The room where this happens will be filled with other cool black girls who write shit down.
Video entries will be added to Myalogy.
That’s the first two months of 2017. I will continue to build upon that momentum. At present, I do not know what that looks like – and that’s okay, FOR NOW. All of us don’t have a day planner for life. All of us don’t even have a plan other than surviving. But, what’s not okay is to rest where you are, if you wanna be somewhere different and thrive, not just survive. A baby step is still a step.
Take it easy on yourself, remind yourself your journey is yours, read one of them “who made it in life, late in life” articles, ask for help and direction if you need it and then get busy.
Or don’t. The Orange One may have us all dead soon anyway.
